


Our Encounter Means by Destiny

by 1117



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Angst, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Fake Science, M/M, Smut, Time Travel, also both main characters died but at the same time they dont, author doesn't know how to tag, but mamamoo legit took over half a page, but not that angst for me, hongjoong!king, hongjoong!past, i mean i tried, im assuring you its happy ending dont panic, its yolo you know?, joseon era, moral of the story: don't waste the most beautiful moments of your life folks, not many of ateez members but the main ship got mentioned, seonghwa!doctor, seonghwa!present, so much fake historical contexts, thats all you need to know :)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:41:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24911764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1117/pseuds/1117
Summary: One moment, Park Seonghwa was one of the best doctors in Seoul,That was until he got stabbed by a patient's guardian, and somehow magically traveled back in time, dressing as a woman, so he won't have his head chopped off.Will he managed to survive and able to seduce this great of a Joseon King among all random angsts, or will he hope for the day of his comeback to the present and forgets as if all these time-traveling shenanigans were non-existed?[Or my first ever ateez/seongjoong au that I wrote for 16 hours straight but failing miserably.]
Relationships: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa
Comments: 5
Kudos: 54





	Our Encounter Means by Destiny

**Author's Note:**

> the thought of seonghwa dressing as a woman in joseon era was plainly came from the drama "the tale of nokdu" which you combine and a nice-looking guy with a hanbok just like my last braincell, then you go "AY FABULOUS LETS WRITE THIS MESS DOWN!1!1!!"  
> i legit stayed up all night writing this i don't think I'm normal at this point.  
> also as much as i would like to be a perfectionist i have little knowledge of how the Korean history actually works, so the majority of the shit i blew in here are all made up. ;")  
> bonus all those medical things at I might have spilled nonsense in there, but it's only a fanfiction so spare me this time. u_u
> 
> the plot was original, yes, i randomly pulled it out from my ass and called it a day.
> 
> ALSO! no beta-read! I'm very sorry for any grammar mistakes or weirdly worded sentence structures.  
> i mean,,,i wrote this for 16 hours,,,it was,,,,rough.
> 
> enjoy i guess :^) or suffer....idk oieyodiqwaspo

[Ah, yes. Me and my Seong Joong sims that I made all by myself and spent some time over the characters' costumes. Am I crazy? Yeah, pretty much ngl. But just a small reveal of how I imagined them while writing this monster.

 **Disclaimer** : I do know how Joseon female nurses and doctors dressed like I just can't find the clothes;-; (i can assure that I binge dramas as much as Seonghwa sksksk) either way pls deal with this cheap version of characters' designs.]

\-------you can check it down here:

**[characters' designs](https://twitter.com/feralchangkyun/status/1276295789350813696?s=20) **

\---

Seonghwa was about to breakdown.

He hadn't slept properly four days straight, and all the man could pull out were little catnaps in between his shift before one of the nurses, _was it Jongho?_ -thumped on the door, noticed him of his next operation in two hours. The calling out was muffed behind the white heavy metal door that he couldn't figure out who said it. In the unconscious mist, Seonghwa stretched his body and cracked a few bones on his neck, shaking his arms tiringly as he pulled the white coat on his shrunk frame. 

To say he hated his job to the core is an overstatement, but sincerely, he wasn't fond of it. The amount of work the young man had to drag out from his ass was absolutely overload. They didn't just randomly pop up for him to handle but also suffocating him every time he rested his legs into the comfy bean bag in his monotone office. Working in the ER sure gave him some gray stains on the nape despite in the middle of his twenties. But he asked for it didn't he? A great job came with great suffering.

Tiredness didn't stop him from resuming through his life befriended with needles and scissors. And it all came with a high cost, he got a roof on his head, a car, beautiful clothes, and a utilitarian kitchen set after two years graduated. Yet, he hated that he didn't really have the time for his own in the past two years. And despite owning a sizeable comfy apartment, his social connection wasn't that great. It was not that he didn't seem that appealing in socializing, he was too occupied with his responsibility that the thought of hanging out and having a normal conversation with the people he knew was considered too fancy. Hell, he didn't live in his apartment anyway, there were many problems to be solved but too little time to handle. Sadly, after he hit the dead-end of his shift, whatever was recoiled in his overworking brain would be when he caught himself on the blue couch of his office.

Seonghwa was born in a rather middle-class family, he wasn't constricted from his hobbies, but was not so freely around his time after school, but to be the truth, neither of his older siblings got any freedom. His parents weren't the type to have bombarded parties in their little backyard. There weren't so many family gatherings on the back, nor thumping music through their eggshell ceilings. And that's good. He wasn't complaining. He wasn't very fond of these associations and glad that his parents didn't include anything adorningly extra every time someone visited their house. He doesn't remember the last time he called his mom, though, was it two? -three months ago? _Shit. What day is it today?_ He can't even keep track of it.

The young doctor has been known for being a prodigy, as he aced in all of his classes back in college days, as expected, his lowest course would score approximately a meriting 94.9%. The professor disliked his guts as Seonghwa reasoned, the fact that she rounded everyone else's final grade but him, riled the young man up for a solid month after the semester ended, the damn anatomy class. It was not that she was anything close to helpful. Seonghwa made it 'til the top, endless all-nighters and cramp-studying graduated with a good record. He got accepted to a good med-school a few months after his application plus good recommendations from his professors. He didn't smoke, didn't drink, and didn't really party. Okay, maybe he lied, he did drink and partied, but that was one of those rare times. 

Seonghwa walked out of his office, exhausted and annoyed, stepped toward the patients' hall, ready for the check-ups. He reminded himself to call his mother as soon as he was done looking through the list of patients and helped them with their daily check-up cycle. It was bearable, not until he reached almost to the third room on the list. The young doctor nodded to himself and called out the nurse beside him, told her to enter the room first while he excused himself to the restroom. The migraine was getting into him, and he had to be focused.

Planning to flash some water to wake his weary subconscious up, he turned his back and heading toward the end of the hall, tightening a wooden-clip underneath his armpit as he checked his phone. Distractedly before a man in, maybe his fifties, with an old rusty-colored bomber jacket and a baseball cap, approached and shuffled Seonghwa's lab coat into his angrily wrinkled fists and yelled into the young man's face.

"You! It was you!"

It was around three in the afternoon; supposedly it was his nap time. Seonghwa volunteered through one of his colleagues' patients list, letting them stay for their little napping. One of the doctors looked worse than he thought earlier, so he assured the guy and took on the job. Good shifts benefited him sometimes after if he needed it. After all, the dude looked drain than expected, he wondered what happened.

It wasn't the first time someone made a fuss in a hospital. And mostly it would be the patients who suddenly charged out of the room without permission. Seonghwa felt uncomfortable. The man wasn't a patient, preferably a patient's guardian, which he had no control over. As much as he would like to converse and soothe this older man down, he did not know what was happening, why he was angry, or why he was getting yelled at. And he had works to do. The younger stuffed his phone back to the white coat pocket in utter confusion. Then calmly sets the man's hands out of his cloak, 

"My apologies, but this is the hospital hallway, patients are resting in this area. Please refrain yourself, sir. I will be right back with you once I finish my job. 

The man looked at him in the most disgusting sight, grabbed into his coat again.

"Your job? You are doing your job now? Fucking son of a bitch! I WANT MY SON BACK YOU SHITTY OF A DOCTOR! He still has his future ahead, and you have to ruin all of his life. WAS IT WORTH?!"

He did not expect that. Not in all of his life, he ever heard anyone cursed at him. He worked diligently and delicate to his patients. There had never been a case that was failed under his hands. If his confidence was at the rooftop, he would proudly say that he was one of the best doctors in Seoul. And here he was, standing in the middle of a hallway with a patient's guardian yelling at him for being a useless piece of shit.

The noisy man screeching through the corridor alerted some of the patients to peak out of the white doors. They stared at the scenario right in front of them with curiosity. A few of the nurses tried to run by and pulled the older man's arms out of the young doctor. It didn't work. He wasn't making any sense. Words messy, and all heard were angry screaming. The man somehow teared up. And as much as Seonghwa tried to renounce himself, he thought this man needed a break more than him. He held no talks of truce in his aggressiveness even a moment after.

Seonghwa didn't know what to do. He can bring a person back to life, as long as it was in his ability, but he cannot solve a situation in which he did not recognize his blame. He was tired from the lack of sleep, and beyond confused by this nonsense trend of revengefulness. He really wanted to listen and help the man, but he needed to check the patients by the end of the day, roughly thirty more people, and maybe sleep until he can't feel a single bone in his body. He felt like he will collapse if this circle kept going. Call him irresponsible, but there was too little context that the man given to apprehend him. Seonghwa apologized to the man and shook his head, picking up the fallen clipboard that was bent to the left from the sudden attack. Upon the bitter figure, he was as composed as he could. Seonghwa felt nervous, hopefully for the securities to come and take the man out. Small apologizing nods and flatting cloak, he walked away.

He did not make it far, though.

The angry man's nostrils flared up as he clutched Seonghwa's coat again, snatched a blood syringe from one of the nurses' cart nearby, and pushed the young man to the wall. He thurst the item into him with force, not just once, but twice, no, thrice. Seonghwa couldn't even make a sound from the unexpected action. Apathetic whimper would be hearkened.

It was quick, sudden, and as painful as he should felt. But everyone now paid attention and ran out for his aid. One of the nurses shrieked out beyond the terrifying scenario. Two figures pulled the man back, leaving a grunting body swallowed by the white wallpaper. It took him a long moment to realize that his baby blue cardigan had been soaked with thick red liquid, covering his palm wetly, and scented so rusty. He can even taste the saltiness in his lips.

Seonghwa lost his sight in an instant, sliding down slowly from the wall. The clipboard fell right out of his arm, smacking on the white tiles painfully, papers scattered. His vision blackouts and he tried his best to stay awake, but his eyes were tired and heavy. Everything felt numb around him, sounds oozing as if he was underwater. There seemed to be something that Seonghwa forgot about, something that continually nagged at his mind a flash before his drop. 

Screaming sounds were heard, like sudden demands, another white coat approached him, it looked like one of his colleagues, Yeosang, was up from his rest. Seonghwa left out a small, breathy chuckle amidst the haze. The latter yelled at another nurse for a stretcher and ran right by his side. The securities arrived and were pulling the old man away, who was also terrified by his own action. The nurses ran and circled around him in panic as they carried him up into the operating room along with chants of "Dr. Park! Can you hear me, Dr. Park? Please try to stay awake! Dr. Park!" 

Being held away, the old man poorly whispered as he shook, "It wasn't me! I-I did not do it, it wasn't me." Almost looked to the point of insanity. If Seonghwa was in his right mind at the moment, he would honestly felt sorry.

The sounds faded soon after, and it's almost like white noises. Blurry images of shadows on top of Seonghwa's face as he stared toward the ceiling.

Right.

He remembered.

He hadn't called his mother.

Seonghwa grunts one last time, a breathless one, and closes his eyes, immersed into the darkness.

\---

"Ah, h're that gent is, the knave hast finally awaketh."

Seonghwa cracked his eyes, wearingly staring at the smooth eggshell ceiling, which he knew was definitely not the hospital. Eyesights were clouded and unfocused. But he wasn't trying to use his brain that much. The pain was incredibly throbbing, mainly in his stomach, if possible, he wished he could puke right where he was.

Said voice came closer to him before he could even lift his body. It felt heavy. And he gulped, feeling a lump in his throat choking on his lack of hydration. His back stiffed and numbed.

Seonghwa felt a bit panicking, where was he exactly, and how or when did he even get to this place. Under his blurry gaze, it looked like some sort of tradition house ceilings, with wooden outlines highlighted the interior and essential decorations of old paintings hung around the walls. If he tried to use his chest a bit, he could smell the light scent of incense in the air, making the whole room cozy and homey, like his grandparents' house.

Not that he should care about what was decorated around him, but where he was, the thought was incessantly nagging him. He slightly remembered what happened at the hospital, and revived the harsh stab, breaking through the skin of his abdomen, but he blacked-out before he can regain any other consciousness of how the world revolved around him. Seonghwa gave a soft wheeze before he tried to push himself up. It wasn't that painful now that he took small breathless inhales and slowly dropped his palm on top of the injury, calming himself.

The voice rang up once again, hurriedly rushed to him as the person carefully held his back and helped him up. It was a rich and deep voice, a young lady with neatly tied up hair and a long emerald hairpin cross through worriedly looking at him and her long white and midnight colored Hanbok reaching to the floor. 

_Wait- Hanbok?_

Seonghwa widened his eyes and stared at the young lady, she asked him how he felt, with that old Korean accent as she looked back at him as if he went insane and probably just waiting to be stabbed again and wake up from this absurd nightmare. Seonghwa admitted that he had been watching a lot of dramas these past few days, with that amount of stress, who wouldn't? But what the actual hell?

Maybe he was in a filming site? And this was all acting? But it made no sense if he was in a filming location when literally the last thing he recollected was he got stabbed in the freaking belly. Unless he was delusional. But in the hell of God's name, he was healthy the last time he checked.

"Young knave, art thee good now?"

"I...uh, I'm f-fine?" His voice cracked as he swallowed, embarrassed at the tone. Seonghwa cringed.

The young lady looked at him, questioning his frantic gaze. He would too if he was her, as she stood silently for a moment before nodding, and marching towards the nearby round table, with pretty expensive materials on top. She poured a small cup of tea and walked back to him, demanding him to drink.

He wouldn't even want to fight back, he was thirsty, and maybe starving too, but he didn't say anything.

Seonghwa hurriedly swallowed the drink and breathed out. Then stared around the room, and then the lady before rolled his eyes back to himself. He was wearing an old white suit for patients in the past, or what it should be in those dramas that he binged maybe two weeks ago. He thought to himself that he must be insane right now, but it felt too real to be counted delusional. He bit his lips and looked as the young lady, nervously fiddled around the fancy cream blanket wrapped over him, crooked out softly, 

"How long have I been out?"

"Three days, young sir." The lady replied calmly.

"What...what era is this?"

"What 'ra? What doth thee cullionly? Unless thou art talking about who is't is ruling ov'r us, then thee shouldst knoweth t's his Majesty Sejo, aight?"

Seonghwa went silent. Alright, it might be cool, and shit watching those traditional dramas and listen to those actors spoke in such almighty sentences and exceeding body gestures. But Seonghwa was no past generation, and he was as clueless as a five years old kindergartener. He could throw that ridiculous of a prodigy title and laughed his chest to content. He was lost. Catching with that limited knowledge of the old spoken Korean, he managed to spot a few words.

_His Majesty Sejo?_

So he must be around the time the Korean language newly established? Maybe a generation after, but that was a long ride. He thought to himself and smirked weirdly, of how he already tried to cooperate with the fact he was in the barely fifteen hundred century, must have been above ten generations of his own family. How funny. Maybe Seonghwa was really insane.

As much as he would love to laugh at how ridiculous things were happening, Seonghwa shook his head, and gave the small cup to the lady, whispered a thank you. The young lady smiled and put the teacup away before she turned and asked, "Young sir, doth thee knoweth wh're art thee coming from?"

_Where am I from?_ Seonghwa chuckled. He didn't even know. 

Not that he even had any place to go, he would if he included the returning to his great great great grandparents and asked to stay. But that sounds laughable.

Seonghwa looked around the place over, noticed the wooden box on the same table, and grinned to himself again, the "old Korean aid-kit case," he assumed, thought that this lady must be some sort of physician. And that was great because, besides medical, he honestly did not know what else could he do, especially in the middle of nowhere with no knowledge of whatsoever. Maybe he should take advantage of this while he could.

He pointed at the box, seeking, switched his voice into that same funny tone of her, trying his best to fit himself in, "I don't have any place to go, but could I stay with you? I don't remember anything, and I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to safely get out of here without a single recollection." Ah, forgive him, he clearly a newbie in speaking like those amazing actors, but at least he tried.

The lady looked at him in thought, as if predicted he would say such things, she nodded and confirmed, "I've known, young man, I've found you over the rock by the lake in Empress Jung's palace, I couldn't stand seeing your stomach soaked in red with that weak vein of yours beating its best to survive. Oh, my fragile heart. I had no choice."

Seonghwa stunned because why the hell would he be found by the lake, with a wound in his stomach, and no one came to discover him but her. But he wasn't ungrateful. And she seemed like a nice person. He looked at her in the eyes to see some thoughts or plans, but she showed genuine about everything she did, at least up to this point, and he was glad that no one else saw him, but this young lady.

"My title is Solla, real name is Kim Yongsun, but be mindful, I would prefer you to speak formally. Hence I am the head physician in this palace." The young lady sternly speaking and looked at him up and down, as if searching for something.

"Solar?" Seonghwa whispered to himself, having the name rolled over his tongue.

"Pardon?" The lady peaked up, and he shyly waved his hand in the air, "it's nothing. But thank you, uh, Solar-ssi."

"Ssi?" The lady spoke again, but now with that cheerful tone in her deep voice, "you know young man, you have such a funny way of speaking earlier. Are you not from here?"

"-what?" Seonghwa flinched, "W-well, I don't, I don't really know-"

"Talk about speaking tone, you dressed weirdly too in that white fabric wrapped around you, the weird-shaped pants that you have earlier. And then the shoes, they were like rocks! It took me quite a moment to get them out of you. And your hair is short. Must you be from somewhere far away? I would not care if you're an assassin because I exist to save people, not to report injured and actual dying people to those useless fat guards seated and laughing over at anything we ladies do." She rolled her tongue, making a little 'tsk' sound before shrugged her shoulders and pouted. "Welp, not that I have much knowledge of the world outside of this gigantic place, but I'm just curious. Just resting for now, and we shall talk about everything else later. I have to visit the main palace for some-" she stopped and reacted darkly to herself, "-business." 

Waiting for the young lady to rant as she was packing her things up, the lady smiled at him, her pearl white teeth showed out playfully as she opened the wooden doors, poking her head inside, "Later, young man. Remember, do not go out unless you want your neck off." And gently close them, with the ugly creak before the room dimmed down into comfortable daylight.

It took a moment for Seonghwa to process her words, and he was exhilarated that she was kind enough to not press on him. Not that he had any way to explain to her. And it sounded unbelievable, even to himself. Seonghwa got out of the hardened but fancy fabrics bed and started stretching himself, feeling every piece in his bones crying back to life. He walked around the room and checking through all those old but elegant decorations and admired them. Such beautiful items that he had never expected to ever see in his hectic life.

The lady did a great job of healing his body, not that he doubted her skill, but it was a great effort to be able to do some sort of raw and complex progress with such genetic materials. He liked those calming incense smells floating around and would love to ask Solar about them once she returns. Seonghwa stretched a bit more, did some light exercises before he felt exhausted once again, and pulled himself back to the thin mat. He took a small nap while waiting for the head physician to comeback, sighing tiredly.

If not, it would be great if he could get himself out of this too real nightmare.

\---

Seonghwa jolted up later with sounds of creaking wooden doors, and a tired Solar walked inside the room, close it slowly. She looked up at him swiftly and smiled, "ah, young man, did I wake you up? I apologize."

Seonghwa shook his head politely and smiled back, "Rough day?" he asked, got himself out of bed. Letting the lady rest her body on the mattress.

"Ah, perhaps, yes. Apparently, uh, my patient," she heavily implied, "he got quite sick without any understanding, and I'm trying to look at the cause, but it has been hours, and I'm not in a great situation yet as you can tell." She sighed and rubbed her eyes, "I must find the cure soon before any more chaos would once be brought up to this rusty of a kingdom. I suppose." And lying down. Seonghwa watched her movements carefully and just stood there, putting all her words into her head. The woman stared at the wall, blankly before she popped up. "Wait, I haven't asked for your name? What is your name? How old are you? Definitely younger than me, I seem lively, but I joke you not, I've hit my thirties. But you look much younger than me." The young lady quipped, and Seonghwa was surprised at that because she looked so youthful. Even if she confirmed she was the head physician in this palace.

Seonghwa hesitated for a moment, and carefully spoke, "Park Seonghwa. Not that I own any title, but Seonghwa should be fine. "

The lady hummed, "Ah, Seonghwa, that's a beautiful name. As in 'To become a flower,?" she questioned.

"To become a star," he corrected, "but the flower is still a nice meaning. Honestly speaking. And they are indeed both the same word."

She kindly smiled at him, "you remembered your name, do you remember anything else? An occupation? Your statue?" Solar shrugged, you might be a scholar's son, and I wouldn't know, right? The world is small." She laughed after. 

Seonghwa smiled back at her, feeling a bit sudden to say and hoped that she wouldn't question more, but this was his chance. "I uh, I sort of remember that I was a healer." Solar raised her eyebrows at that, "Well, at least I think I am? I have enough knowledge to save people, if that what you need to apprehend?" 

It took the young lady a moment as she stared at him in shock. She tilted her head a little and deep in thought, suddenly, she spoke, "You!" Seonghwa jumped, flinched at her raised of volume.

"How poor young, young man!" She abruptly hugged him, making the angle awkward, "A fellow physician like me! Oh! To be stabbed and woke up speaking nonsense." Seonghwa cringed at that. "And all you did was what? Saving people!" She whined loudly, as if screaming her own life out, too. And he understood because it was accurate. He saved people all his life, and got stabbed and be called a useless piece of shit, something that he would take to heart forever. It was his pride throwing outright at the window. But he patted her and lightly pushed her away as the young lady still sobbed over his story, and smiled, "well, I uh, I'm in my mid-twenties if you wondered." She nodded in between her sobs, "And I would like to join you? If possible? Maybe an assistant is fine. But besides being what I currently do, I honestly do not know what else can I capable of doing. And I'm sure where I am nor what I could possibly do." Seonghwa nervously held his white shirt. And Solar blinked at him.

"Young man," she sighed, "you're giving me a hard task." The man shrank his frame at that. " Not that I wouldn't help you, but nobody knows you, and I can't just bring a random man into our department and making you as my assistant. Not when we are all women-" Seonghwa widened his eyes, _Wait._ "Okay, I know what you're thinking, yes, we are all female physicians in this palace, you want males? Sure maybe go look for those old hags in the castle, but I bet they would call the guards upon you for being an intruder. We are all females here, but remember." She squinted her eyes, looking at him, "we are also great physicians, and never doubt our abilities." _He wouldn't, not when she saved his life_. "And maybe you can be my assistant, and I actually want to see how you would be working with the patients. It might sound like I'm pushing responsibility on your shoulders, but I'm at the dead-end." She sounded severe but exhausted as if she was hiding something that seemed too painful to reveal. "And it honestly can't be any more lost with our current lack of medicine and knowledge." Seonghwa wanted to protest at that. He was sure she was one great doctor, but he held back. "And I mean, I could bride those greedy hags to prepare your paperwork, but that means you might have to dress up as one of us. Unless you have any other ideas."

Seonghwa lost his words. By means, he had to dress as a woman to be the head physician's assistant. And it not as if he had a choice, either follow the only source he could trust. Or go out and be dead, knowing nobody. Not even his siblings can't recognize his own existence and where he was. Talked about siblings, he hadn't also called his mom, and God's forbidden, the phone had never been a thing in this middle of a turbulent century.

Seonghwa stood there silently, thoughts and thoughts lapping over him. He might be a prodigy, but he was a human, and inevitably somehow stuck in the middle of a freaking Joseon Era wouldn't do him much of such a fast thinker. He groaned as if that was his destiny and ruffed his own hair, the smooth black bangs messed up a little on the top right. He nodded, 

"Fine, I will...I will do that." 

Solar looked surprised that he actually agreed, but eventually approved back and grinned, "Alright, young boy. Seonghwa, right? I will find the officer tomorrow and make him adds your title as my faraway cousin, alright?" Seonghwa nodded. "By the end of the day, make sure you figure out things around while I'm gone, I will give you some uniforms now to try on, just remind me if they're too small, I will look for the tailor for the bigger size tomorrow. Now I'm going to sleep, it's been a messy day. Goodnight, Seonghwa, you can go sleep on the couch over there since you healed." Without even bother to change anything else, Solar wrapped herself immediately on the cozy cream blanket and closed her eyes, might also look a bit content.

Seonghwa felt ridiculous, maybe weirded out, with how crazy her suggestion was, she seemed cooperated when he was, in fact, a stranger in this place. She even offered clothes, a job, and told him what to do. And hell, dressing up as a woman when he was clearly a man. Shouldn't Joseon people be more strict with that zone of sexism? Or did he read that wrong all those times? Or maybe she was this kind, perhaps she did this for a purpose, she looked as if hiding something and was waiting for him to bait, but either way, he was thankful. The number of unhealthy gore scenes of all those dramas flashing by his head reminded him that he could be dead already, if not because of her. Seonghwa shook himself out of the little goosebumps session, hopefully, to either get back to his place or ended up waking up safely as he closed his eyes.

\---

A few days after being under Solar's guide, Seonghwa started to get used to the palace, maybe not all of them, since there were restricted places, and he didn't have enough access to go through, even if it was a small lookover. But he had come to understand enough that despite those dramatic triangle loves in those dramas he had watched, the historical settings were solely accurate. He got to keep his name, excepted the Hanja was changed, not that he minded since Seonghwa still hoped that he could invariably be able to go back. As long as he kept that in thought. 

Seonghwa recalled that one drama, "The Tale of Nokdu," and laughed at how hilarious it was that he felt resembling the male lead, dressing up as a woman and such. At least he didn't have to speak for too long, beside Solar, three other female physicians knew about his identities since those were the ones Solar entrusted. And he felt grateful that they didn't ask much about his profile, and they willingly escorted him around, telling him what to do and gave him plenty joking-slaps on the shoulders whenever he did something satisfying them. Maybe his prodigy title suited his figure, as he adjusted himself into the lifestyle that they have, the most he could do was raising his voice to the point of sounding almost female. Most physicians in the palace called him attractive, and his smooth skin even made some ladies at the field felt mortifying if that was what they have been telling him. He just shyly nodded and focused on his tasks after. Some little makeup to cheered his tone highlighted his elegant look.

Since all he had to was to understand the use of each medical tool in the past, his basic knowledge still present. And he soon started working out, with his quick blessing of memory, Solar approved of his appearance in the ward quickly weeks after and allowed him to do a basic check on some patients who assigned on themselves on the sick list. Seonghwa happily complied.

Two months passed by, and Seonghwa drowned through the line people working, fitting himself as a physician's assistant after the pharmaceutical test written by the elderly medical officers in the palace. He soon got his status up and became a physician himself, the young man worked quietly, and never spoke more than three sentences as he lowered his face, ignoring the curious stares from the people surrounding his place, regardless if it was good or bad. Until one day, the king palace gave him the imperial order, the same one that Solar had received continuously every month, as a calling toward the King's to treat for his sickness. Seonghwa quickly learned after that this was solely the reason why the head physician allowed to let him stayed with her. And he felt responsible, so he cooped up with himself, and waited to face whatever sickness could bring upon him. 

Seonghwa knew that with his influence of knowledge and studies in his generation, it would be advantageous to pinpoint the illness as quickly as possible, so he walked in the King's private chamber with confidence, hopefully, to help bury the burden on all of the physicians' shoulders completely. Even if he didn't belong here, he felt protective over all those young and old women working hard every day, picking different types of plants and medicines as they wrapped them in doses, giving out to those sick ones, not minding at their own healths.

The young man anxiously walked toward the peaceful lying body of one great King, blocked by a thin layer of the neat-sewed golden net between them as he took the King's hand, which surprisingly, much smaller than his before he checked the vein.

It wasn't easy to do since he was used to having a stethoscope with him. Still, he had come to learn that everything he did must be followed with this era as he spent the remarkably limited time to learn how to understand the causes of many sicknesses based on blood veins. It fascinated him to the core, reminded him of why he became a doctor, and he was stressed, but there were also happy times alone those busy schedules.

Seonghwa burrowed his brows, questioned through the thin layer of net, understanding why would such matter had been the hot topic among those ladies.

There was clearly nothing wrong with the King. He seemed healthy, a defined vibrant, natural skin color, body relaxed, and not a single heartbeat seemed out of tune. Seonghwa confused as he stared blankly, deep in thought, trying his best to know if the man beyond him was fine, how come he hadn't been waking up for months. He looked up to the old eunuch stood by the wall of the King's right side bed, and softened his voice, "Has his Highness ever ate anything strange on the day he fainted? Or has there been any symptoms before the time he went into slumber?" The old man looked at him and shook his head, sadly spoke, "he was salutary, dear God, his Highness even laughed and went out to play kickball with the General, my old ego thought that was a great day. He suddenly dropped down that night after reading the last paperwork. My poor heart was terrified to death!" The eunuch sounded more broken, hands shaking as he tried to remember the unfortunate months before. 

But Seonghwa didn't understand. If someone was this healthy, even laughed and ran, showed no sign of symptoms sudden collapsed in a second of randomness like this made no sense. Not even in his life that he ever witnessed this kind of patient, and Seonghwa felt awful, his confidence drained out of his face as he overlooked at the King, goosebumps creeped out and thought of that goddamn Kingdom Netflix series. A mistake for watching through that one not knowing it was a zombie movie. Truly a mistake! As he always reminded himself in his misery. Oh gosh, what if he started growling and jumped out of his face, giving him an excellent scratch right in the center and becoming a zombie? _Absolutely tragic_ , Seonghwa thought. After all, it had already been weird traveling back in time. Zombies would probably be a terrible bonus.

Seonghwa shook himself out of that horrible thought, repeatedly chanting that he was just weird and overreacting. He looked at the eunuch and begged to check the King's face, especially under this mysterious circumstance. The old man shocked upon Seonghwa's request and was about to mock him for his rudeness, but the young man quickly proposed, "I would need to check his body and face to see any other signs before I could give him my cure, it is up to your consent, and of course, his Highness, too. But this is necessary for his instant healing, and I shall suggest that you must make the right choice towards his Majesty's recovering." The eunuch hesitated for such a long moment before his shoulder dropped and led his hand toward the King's bed, allowing the young physician to stepped inside and checked.

At first, he looked around the normally breathing body. It might seem quite content if not because of his unconscious expression. Noiselessly, Seonghwa pulled up through the golden net and stared at a young man with a quite pointy nose and soft eyelashes quietly breathing on the fancy golden fabric beds, with dragons wrapping through his clothes and blanket, adorning the untouchable aura surrounded him. Seonghwa exhaled a small breath that he didn't realize he held and went to look through the young, and if necessary, mentioned, one attractively handsome King. But it clearly not his business to fancy over some stranger despite his own sexuality, and being King or not, distinctly not his right to gush over. Seonghwa checked through every part he could once last time before he gave out a desperate exhalation and proceeded to get out of the small bed, blocked by the thin golden fabric towards the public eyes. 

As Seonghwa walked out halfway, the eunuch looked at him, the same disappointment and sadness unbothered to remove, sighed tiredly and nodded. The young man belatedly reached out of the King's mattress and almost reached his medicine box before he felt a gentle grip on his right wrist, warm and careful. He abruptly turned around, astounded as seeing the King gazed at him, eyelids heavily fought to open and mouth dry as if attempting to tell him something. Nothing seemed to come out of his drained vocal. Seonghwa immediately called the eunuch as the old man hurriedly rushed to the bed, cried in joy, and tried his best to be tender. He pushed the young King up, and Seonghwa just stood there dumbfounded before he knocked his mind off for feeling distracted upon fully seeing his Majesty fiercely looked back at him. As if he was reading him, and Seonghwa suddenly felt very much exposed. The King didn't utter a word, much more like he was trying to compose himself. But Seonghwa bowed down to him and pulled out a small box of health medicine. Solar gave that to him before his living, said it should help his Majesty somewhat, and Seonghwa noticed it was just red ginseng rolled into a ball. Which genuinely didn't do much but a giving a bunch of hormones into the body. But it was like munching on a chocolate bar during Winter days, and if this was how people back then treated themselves, which not wholly pleasant unless one is used to it, he then had no objection.

Seonghwa walked out of the King's chamber, feeling as light as he could. Leaving the young King stared as his back with his eunuch sobbed over how much he worried about the man. As soon as Seonghwa reached the medicine house, he greeted Hyejin, who was still wrapping the medicine prescription, and cheerfully said, "Guess what?"

Hyejin, as unbothered as she usually was, continued with her job and asked back with a whatsoever tone, "What?" Totally not engaging in his excitement.

Seonghwa sat down by her and looked at the neatly wrapped herbs, "well, guess where I just came back from?"

Hyejin looked at him confusingly before she gasped. 

"Wait! Park Seonghwa! What the hell?"

Seonghwa shrugged, still having that smugged smile on him, "Oh my God? Did you just? At one time? OH MY GOD?!" Hyejin was practically yelling all over the house, caught attention from Moonbyul, the second head physician walking toward them. Not that he minded, but besides the high-ranked physicians, everyone else just used their real names to associate with one another.

"What's happening?" Moonbyul sat along with them as she looked at Seonghwa, curiosity vivid in her eyes. Before she caught herself and gave out a funny "oh."

Hyejin wouldn't stop screaming and widened her eyes as she talked, "Are you kidding me? All this time, we could have to send him to the chamber instead of wasting our time making a cure for a disease that not even Solar managed to spot." She shacked her shoulders as if all of her stresses have vanished in such a short moment. And Seonghwa was glad that he did something, even though he believed that he did nothing at all.

But because the cause of sickness was so strange, he couldn't come to explain how did he manage to wake the King up, so despite instant train of questions pointing at him once Wheein also got back from her little medicine picking routine, he tried his best to change the subject. He acted as if it was his secret weapon to cure the young man. By the end of the day, Seonghwa tiredly sighed as he put down all of his stuff, went for a cold shower, and pulled his mattress out, which Solar gave him a small spare room somewhere in the corner of the whole infirmary sections of the palace, reading for his sleep.

His thought wondered how strange that was, having the King stared up at him, he held him when he barely woke up and even tried to tell him something, he felt as if something tugged at him, but wasn't reasonable enough to explain his train of thoughts. Seonghwa breathed softly as he blew the candles out and buried himself under the blanket. 

_Better not to think than overthinking._

\---

The whole palace raised up with the news that the King had become healthy and returned to his throne as expected. Most government officials suggested a comeback party, and the King excepted their request. During such weeks, the young King had been catching up with many documents and proclamations that he seemed to have no time checking other things. Not like Seonghwa cared, but ever since that day, he felt weird, mainly of those sharp gazes that looked as if tattooed into his mind, and he felt somewhat deprived but wasn't sure when and why would he felt as such emotion.

Seonghwa would still be longing for his return to where he came from and anticipated for the day it would happen. He just didn't know when.

Solar said he had been working hard lately, and granted him one free day of going out and having fun in the downtown. He gladly excepted, feeling as if it was a great opportunity of enjoying his youth ever since he graduated college. Seonghwa walked around freely under men's clothes, for once after such a long time, he felt like pulling out the mask that he had been trying to cover after all these courses. Delightedly strolling down the path of busy people yelling under different kinds of stores. He planned to buy some basic necessaries and maybe a few hairpins for his close group of physicians, smiling as he looked through the different designs of butterflies and flowers bounded in the edge of those pins. Seonghwa carefully selected four nice-looking hairpins in four different colors and stuffed them into his bags after paying the seller. 

Before he even got to leave the small counter, heading out of the street, he bumped into a figure that stood right next to him. Who also was picking out a piece of jewelry for their own. The young man yelped and dropped his coin after the sudden encounter, hurriedly bent over his knees, trying to reach the lost coin, except Seonghwa was faster. The young man cheerfully thanked him and chose out a white, nicely decorated hair brooch before he ran off to whoever was stood, waiting for him.

The young man he bumped, with his fancy purple clothes set as he waved the white jewelry in the air, smiling as the man who was waiting for him, dressing in somewhat even more elegant clothes while he shouted a charming, "Hyung! How about this one?" The other man turned around and stared at the object in awe, before smiled and took it, whispered a small thank. Seonghwa couldn't see the man face at first, but thinking it was not like he cared, so he slightly turned away, until the man looked up at him, with his eyebrows furrowed. Seonghwa regretted that he even bothered to turn around and watched their little excitement, mostly came from the guy in the purple clothes, but he turned his head back, frightened because that was clearly the _KING_ looking at him.

Seonghwa could be anything, his acting would be great if he was honest, and maybe if he tried hard enough. But not when the King was barely five feet away from him and felt suffocated, he had the need to run away and hide before his dumbass got exposed and be killed. Not quite a lovely thought. Said King started to walk toward him. _Okay, why the fuck would, he does that?_ Seonghwa panicked, and abruptly marched away from those two as fast as he could, almost pushed his legs to a quick run, hearing a distant 'hey!' the moment he was out of their sight. Seonghwa hid by the nearby walls and breathed tiredly. He tried to swallow his desert throat and dulled his chest, before running back to the infirmary, looking as if he had seen a ghost. It would indeed be one if he wasn't so haunted by the latter's eyes. Knowing that his neck could be chopped off any moment.

He was glad no one was nearby, or he wouldn't know how to explain himself. 

Seonghwa dropped by the head physicians and his two friends' rooms, putting the hairpins closed to their makeup tables, smiling at his little surprised before he ran back to his room. Naively, no one should be knocking on his door that he had no task to touch today. And he locked the door, taking an early sleep than usual, at seven p.m.

Three days after, when the feast would happen at night, Seonghwa received an invitation in the morning unexpectedly. He questioned the sudden suggestiveness in the letter since it only made sense if the physicians' heads attended, which Solar and Moonbyul will. But he didn't have any status in the infirmary besides a doctor's title. And he was a sand piece amidst this vast desert called the palace. He rejected the King's present as raising his statue after saving the latter's life. He ignored any sort of 'gifts' greedy officials would ask him, or worse, using their advantage in title and superiority in sex to control him. But as funny as it was. Seonghwa was a man himself. And he was good with his words. Good enough to dodge those dangerous suggestions, which landed him safely time after time. So why would he receive an invitation of a feast upon his Majesty's recovery? Seonghwa looked at the red envelope in confusion before putting it away and started his day, trying his best not to think about it.

But Solar and Moonbyul tried to convince him by the end of the day when they were all packing up their tools and getting back to their room earlier than usual, preparing for the upcoming feast. Seonghwa sighed in exhaustion as he got inside his room, tried his best to put on the most decent dress he had despite feeling awkward showing up beyond the public eyes with something he didn't want or fond over but more of a protection for himself.

Seonghwa asked the ladies to help him with his makeup and fixed his hair, they were happy to help somehow, just like Sleeping Beauty's Godmothers, they successfully transformed him into a reflection of someone he couldn't even recognize. It was Seonghwa, but it wasn't. More elegant. More softened. _More powder._

It wasn't that he disliked it, it just felt off settling under a different skin. But who was he to complain? Carefully adjusting his dress, Seonghwa politely sat down at one of the sections designed for the healers and his two head physicians. 

The party went on smoothly, the King sat at the top throne of the whole hallway palace, listening to his officials laughing nonsense over some dumb old dad jokes. Seonghwa took a peek at him, and it clearly screamed that the King was bored the hellfire out of this party as if he desired to leave as soon as possible, but there seemed to be something that held him back. As he faked his smile and enduring through all these loud played music and boring politics talks.

At some point, their eyes met, and Seonghwa felt the need to shy his glances away. But the King kept looking at him, to the point he unconsciously raised his hand up to check his face, seeing if there was anything stuck beneath all those cake of red lipsticks and dusty foundation. Seonghwa noticed the latter's gesture, and he waved to the nearby maid, whispering something into her ears. She nodded and walked away, then he proceeded to look at him again. Giving out a playful smirk, much to Seonghwa's amusement.

After the dancers performed a few songs with their beautiful sways and hip movements, the maids appeared after with their stepped of dishes decorated nicely on white porcelain plates. Somehow only Seonghwa's dish was pink, but he didn't press on much, presumed that they were probably out of plates. Seonghwa munched on the strange, cutely decorated snacks, and couldn't stop himself from eating. He didn't even realize the snacks were long gone, and he was just pinching on the dust of crumbs. He chuckled to himself before sitting through the rest of the party and perhaps started procrastinating a bit. 

College parties, workplace parties, even family parties, he had been attended. But the King's party? That was definitely a first. Seonghwa walked out of the party section, feeling hyper and hotter than accustomed, his legs wobbled as he tried to walk and felt his cheeks bright red as he touched them. Not even the foundation would be able to cover how red they were, and he seemed suffocated. He remembered not even tasting a single drop of alcohol before leaving, so why did he feel like being drugged on. He shook his head, trying to gain awake of his surroundings, Solar and Moonbyul were long gone, God knows where would they be, but he was dizzy, and he didn't think he would make himself back into his room in time. Not when he didn't even know where he was heading to, and his legs feel heavy. 

He gave out eventually, couldn't make out where he stepped on as the blurriness covered his eyesight once this whole of madness started to kick in. Seonghwa would doubt the day after that there was some sort of aphrodisiac drug inside one of the food that he ate. He just couldn't pinpoint what, worse, that he was a heavy-eater. His body felt hot all of a sudden, and he just wanted to take off his clothes under the intense burning of his skin. Now that he knew exactly what his body was doing, he couldn't seem to react when a shadow engulfed him, holding him up gently as he unintentionally rested his head into their shoulder, breathing in rapid gasps, eyes drooping.

It took a moment after for him to realize he was lying on a bed, continually exhaled as he stared at the ceiling, feeling as if someone was sitting next to his vulnerable figure. Seonghwa turned his head hearing a light chuckle as the shadow looked down into his face, the dimness of the room made it hard to recognize who that face belonged to, but the voice was blueprinted, and Seonghwa knew who was with him, and how fucked up himself was.

The first thought popped in his mind was he wouldn't get to see his parents ever again. The second thought was one of his older siblings still owned him seven hundred thousand won, and it had been since his freshman year of college. _Unacceptable_. His last thought he would have to die, somewhere none of his relatives or family would be able to find. And that was fucking sad. He wanted to cry, feeling unable to do anything, horny, tired, and stressed out. Maybe that he was genuinely cried at some point, the young King stopped his chant of a laugh before looking down at him. Actually seemed _concerned_.

If he was him, he would call himself mad with how eccentrical he was right now.

Seonghwa whimpered at the discomfort of his overheated and hard body, covered under his dress, and looked up at the King, feeling exposed on so many levels. The young King stared at him, somewhat silently, just observing how he sobbed quietly with tears rolled down to both sides of his temples, with eyes closed and unsteady breathes. Then he hummed, and gently touching his forehead, riding out the front hair that blocked his face, making it seemed even more erotic than assumed. 

Seonghwa bit his lips at the touch, under the effect of the drug, he must be out of his mind if that was the only excuse he could pull out. The King seemed to be amazed at his little breathless reactions, and patted his cheek, pulled his face towards him closer, in a suggestive way. 

"Park Seonghwa," he spoke lightly as if whispering against a feather. "Who are you? Really?" Seonghwa stayed silent, as if not knowing how to respond. 

"I-I..."

"Hmm?" The King pressed on, pushed his thumb on top of the latter's stomach, and he mewled softly, trying his best to bite on the under-lip, embarrassing from making any more sounds. 

Seonghwa shook his head as he cried harder, suppressing himself from reacted more to the other's touch, refused to say anything,

The King played with his stomach and slightly dragged his fingers toward his chest, wing-like, and successfully choked out a moan from Seonghwa's red lips. 

The King looked at his sight over a little, maybe did feel bad, but didn't express anything until he spoke up again, "What was that world about?" 

His question was absurd, sudden, and confused. Seonghwa looked at him under all those unshed tears and uttered a broke "w-what?" The King looked at him again, with messy hair, definitely fake hair, roughed clothing, and sighed, "I mean, the one where you came from, with people dressing weirdly and everyone's hair was short."

_How did he-_

Seonghwa stared at him startled, feeling absolutely disconcerted and bewildered. But the young King didn't look at him, and continued with his explanation, "I was there for quite sometimes I think? With all those people walked in my comfort zone and mentioned about me and something was wrong with my heart. I mean their ways of speaking were quite funny. As if I listened to a whole different language even when I still managed to catch a few words out of a whole sentence. I tried to open my eyes sometimes, but it was too bright. Everything seemed overly white to me, I gave up."

"You-" Seonghwa stuttered, "I-" The King was now laughing at him like himself was the actual insane one, not Seonghwa. "I know, right? What shocked me was the fact that everyone who walked in that room knew my name! The King Sejo, I mean, not even my mother's most trusted maid, allowed me to call out my name like that. And all I constantly heard to the point of madness was them calling me repeatedly 'patient Kim Hongjoong, patient Kim Hongjoong!'" He gave out another light chuckle. Then he composed himself and shook his head. "I overheard a conversation between these two healers about a recent healer who passed away, stupidly as they mentioned," the King huffed, "my father, my great long-gone father," was mentioned as the cause of that healer's death. And the healer's name was Park Seonghwa."

The King himself, if not worse, inhaled in a deep breath before he grunted, "Now, tell me, Park Seonghwa, who are you? And what has happened to me? For all I know, you were the very first one I saw as I woke up."

"I..." Seonghwa fell silent as if something ugly had crawled up his skin and swallowed up all of his point of existence. He wanted to roll in a ball and cried over the excessive information that had been displaced. And now it made sense, it made so much sense, but at the same time, it didn't. 

Maybe Seonghwa positively went beyond the scheme of insanity. As he stared blankly toward the more detailed decoration in the King's room, he gasped out tears that seemed even more painful than he ever let himself to make. Feeling how tightened his chest was and just wanted to explode immediately, right in front of this world. He didn't care if the King was still right next to him.

Seonghwa couldn't seem to take it, the word "death" was so plainly thrown out, it felt too quick, too honest, and too painful to grip on, even try to understand it. He felt as if his heart was shattered in fifth. And he cried at how unfair it was, his life was ripped right in front of him, most unexpectedly, and he didn't have one word with his family yet. He felt stolen, cheated, and even been shredded to the point of unrecognizable. And all these times, Seonghwa kept the hope that maybe he could still come back to where he was. Perhaps he still had that chance.

But not anymore. And Seonghwa felt like having no will to live, not when his young life had been robbed out without knowing why he died.

Seonghwa remembered something, then quickly looked at the King, who seemed to be as emotionally as exhausted as him, and asked, "Do you mayhaps know, the doctor that treated patient Kim Hongjoong?" The young King widened his eyes, and roared, "How dare you called-"

"-Please," he soon got cut off by Seonghwa's desperate cry, "please just tell me." 

The King stared at him, eyes annoyed, but spoke otherwise, "if I recall, it was doctor Yoon, I think. or at least that was what I heard." 

Seonghwa whispered, calmly recollected at all of his colleagues, until he recalled a drained figure walking inside of the office, looking stressed out than usual. He, in fact, was the one Seonghwa was helping with the check-up routine for. And if he could assume his best, patient Kim Hongjoong's father must have been through the list of doctors who did their patients' check-ups and mistook him as Dr. Yoon. Seonghwa chuckled at his fate, at how ridiculous everything was, and how irrational it was. His life got traded up from the modernized world. He believed once that he belonged there before turning into some sort of faking paperwork and sexuality to survive in the middle of nowhere with no recollection of close connection.

And he died because of a misunderstanding, as much as he wanted to yell at his own faith, he couldn't seem to yell at the older man who panicked after stabbed him either. He must be in some sort of pain, too. If he still knew how to be humane. And Seonghwa hated himself for that, for being too considered, too forgiving. But his thought stopped when he realized that he hadn't answer any of the King's questions, and as much as Seonghwa wanted to scream _"Fuck It!"_ it didn't seem like he had a choice, either. More of being oppressed under the King's chamber, especially not when he was emotional while drugged.

Seonghwa tried to put himself together and sniffed, brought up his shaky hands, and wiped out his tears, carefully whispered under the broken tone, "the world that you properly were in, was in the future. Sound stupid, I know, but I've come here from where you have stuck at all those months ago, and I was found with a stab wound on my stomach when I was first seen here. I got treated and was given two choices: 

either to live under the circumstance where I was found in or just screaming out who I am and being killed for being a palace's intruder." He laughed at how irony everything was, "I tried to work as a physician assistant, and took the test to be a physician myself until I was called in and treated your comma. And surprisingly, you woke up." He chuckled dryly at the last part and gave a gasp as if most of his rock has been lifted.

The King stared at him in troubled, as if trying to figure out everything else himself.

Seonghwa closed his eyes, furrowed his brows, and recomposed himself before opened his eyes again, now that they were clear of tears, the King noticed their define lines of gentleness. But also a hint of cat-like shape. "Do whatever you want." Seonghwa talked brokenly, throat sore from his previous antic,

"What?"

"I mean it, do whatever you want, kill me, kick the bucket, whatever the fuck you would do now, you know who I am." Seonghwa looked at him sternly, as if annoyed by the King's sudden hesitation and confusion. As if everything was now revealed but felt like the young King had been slower by two steps.

"I won't."

Now it was Seonghwa's turn to surprised. "What?"

"I won't kill you."

"W-why?" Seonghwa felt his heart chunked down as if he should be happy to be released but couldn't coop himself to understand why the King would choose such ways.

"I won't, not when I felt like we must have some connection with one another. Not when you woke me up from that long time of slumber. And not when you have died and traveled back to here. Don't you think it's a new chance for you to live your life?" the King hummed under deep thought, leaving a shocked Seonghwa, staring at him under his mattress.

"You...you believed everything I said? Even if it made no sense? Even if it sounded ridiculous?"

The young King then laughed, "well, do you have any other explanation?" Upon Seonghwa's silence, he laughed again; it made him seemed younger than all of the responsibilities on his shoulders. "Then we are settled." Not that the King had any other kind of excuse spoke of, either way, he witnessed the even weirder parts these past few months. It would make more sense if he was the one acting ominous.

"Besides," the King bent down toward Seonghwa, who was still limply lying on the bed. "I wouldn't want such beauty like you to die." He smiled and showed out his sharp-formed teeth as they lightened up his whole face. "I will keep you around Park Seonghwa, whether you like it or not." He patted his cheeks before turning his back and walked out of doors with a yell-back, "Sleep, it helps reduce your pain better than staying up and suffering through it. By tomorrow it should be gone. I will take a night walk." as he headed out under the twilight.

Seonghwa stared at his long gone shadow for a while, before sleep actually settled. His brain was frying from overworking and absorbing information. And it was one of those rare times when he believed that he deserved some good sleep.

He fell into one carelessly, not noticing the blanket's slight heavy feeling being warmly drafted over him an hour later.

\---

After the party night incident, Seonghwa dodged the King's palace more regularly. And surely on purpose, he refrained himself from walking outside too much, not when he wouldn't know what to say if he ever "accidentally" encounter the King. The female physicians were confused by his abnormal behavior, that until Moonbyul got irritated by his own hide-and-seek antic, and started sending him out to buy more herbs. Seonghwa walked out of the infirmary bitterly, still in his physician uniform since those herb stores usually gave the palace's workers discount, and he enthusiastically took benefit of that. As he was mumbling how much of a bully his head physician was and how much he would love to not walking outside, the moment he got back, the King had been waited outside of the infirmary, grinning at him.

"Since when are we friends?" Seonghwa mumbled tiringly, "your Highness, I don't think you're supposed to be here."

The King dressed quite comfortably today, without his heavy attire of royal suits, nor the golden black belt stripped right in the middle. Not that Seonghwa was checking him out. Totally _not_.

"Hongjoong." the King spoke, 

"What?" Seonghwa looked at him in surprised,

"I supposed, we are much closer now, Hongjoong is fine." He assured him, 

"But your Majesty, I-" 

"Just take it," the King looked at him warningly, and Seonghwa took back, whatever he planned to say next, "just know that beside General Jung and my mother, you are those rare ones who get to call my name."

"T-that...that's such a huge honor, y-"

"Park Seonghwa."

"...H-Hongjoong. That is a tremendous honor. At least to me," Seonghwa whispered to himself, but the young King caught on either way. 

"But you're my exception," He laughed. And Seonghwa tried not to take his words to heart as much.

\---

Ever since Hongjoong's allowance for Seonghwa stepped into his life, suddenly, everything changed even as Seonghwa denied them. Not that he didn't like the closeness, but Seonghwa usually didn't have a stable relationship with anyone else back in his old life, so the shift was admirably challenging for him.

Hongjoong tried his best to see him, ignoring the cumbersome title that he carried every day, just to see a small grin from the young physician, and the effort had warmed Seonghwa up more than anything else. Even to the point, he didn't realize Hongjoong's position in their little push-and-pull might have moved a little close, now.

Seonghwa might be a prodigy at everything, but reasonably, trying to NOT falling in love was definitely not something he was good at. And he really tried, maybe he was too soft to not working hard enough. 

And as much as Seonghwa tried to hide, his secretion and nervousness didn't really hide under his daily mask. Peculiarly if it was so severe and vital to him.

Hongjoong felt sick one day, ailing in his bed, causing the little train of thoughts immediately panicked in Seonghwa's little brain. The young physician instantly jogged toward the King's chamber, searching for any discomfort from the latter as he checked the man and scripted out a prescription for him before pulling through his potion and medicine box, looking for the necessary drug for the particular sickness. He spent all night pampered Hongjoong until the moment he returned health and joyful again, earning a burden deep inside of Seonghwa's chest. The King had been jokingly told that Seonghwa was too overthinking and overreacting. Seonghwa huffed annoyingly, but couldn't care to feel angry about his words, especially not from Hongjoong. 

He thought he might have cared about the King too much. Maybe more than how "friends" would generally feel like.

Seonghwa proposed about his feeling one day, when they stole some alcohol in the kitchen, and dumbly giggled over a birdnest that looked like General Jung's hair in the morning, trying to switch over their conversation when hearing no answer from Hongjoong. The young King peeked over his lashes and secretly cracked a smile. 

_If only he knew._

\---

Rumors had been spread that King Sejo seemed to have a lover whom he cherished dearly. And as much as the public eyes always whispering about his love life, it appeared unaffected to Hongjoong, considering his used to be the talk of the town. And Seonghwa felt somewhat relieved that neither of the King or himself would receive any sort of banishment with the secret that nobody knew about who he really was, besides the four physicians. Surprisingly, they seemed to cheer up even more whenever Hongjoong showed up just to take Seonghwa somewhere. Seonghwa would always nag back with his demeanor of being irresponsible and kept doing useless things. Deep inside, though, they both knew he was pleased. 

It turned out to be more of guilt as first, the King confessed sometimes after, as Hongjoong started to attach to him, but there were always hints of courting, too, as to how one might say it. Until one point, neither of them know how and what happened, but they ended up found each kissing under the rocks hidden from inside the palace's garden. It was sudden, Seonghwa asked if he ever tried buldak ramen before Hongjoong shook his head as smirked, "no, but I want to taste you." As they pressed their lips on each other, softly, and contently.

\---

Despite all those years of being together, neither of them had ever asked for anything more. Not that Hongjoong didn't want to, but he was waiting for Seonghwa's consent, and as much as he craved for it every time their makeout session got a bit deeper than planned, it was either of the two would tell each other to stop. Hongjoong didn't want to push in, and Seonghwa was still figuring out what they were since he was clearly not wishing to involve in the palace's politics nor able to bear a child. So their relationship reminded the same. Seonghwa wanted to put a title, but it all in together. He gave up, maybe decided that he had already been content with what he had.

Hongjoong said Seonghwa had all choices, and he was grateful for that.

Until one day that Hongjoong appeared more worn out than he would typically be, his duty became even more stressful than the much bullshit he had been dealing with for the past years, Seonghwa decided to step in another step. 

Knowing that they have been together for such constant times, Seonghwa realized he had nothing to lose but their little enjoyment if he didn't seek it. 

Leading the young King to his chamber, Seonghwa engulfed him in a deep, longing kiss, letting the latter cradle him, cherishing him, and trying to please the man he loved.

Hongjoong sighed to the kiss almost instantly as he hummed, chasing the tongue that the other sensually stuck out as they grind each other. Seonghwa let out soft moans as Hongjoong trailed through his necks, giving sweet licks and bites over the sensitive neck, listening to the mewls from the young physician. He bit down some sharp teeth marks, before trailing up again and bit Seonghwa's earlobe, making the man slightly flinched, and gasp out a breathy sigh. 

Hongjoong took his time pealing of both of their clothes, as he devouringly kissed his lover and slowly traded over the smooth skin of his back, over and over. And he kissed those sensitive nipples, licking at them, bit them, and roughly played around it his tongue, making Seonghwa give out those high-pitched whines that he would never get bored listening to. Seonghwa's hands tried to look for something to attach on as he lay on his back, body naked and fully exposed to the man above him. Hongjoong looked down at the latter's uncomfortably twisted body before landing his hand on a small porcelain bowl of essence oil, spreading them over his palms before he touched Seonghwa's thighs softly. Making the other flinched over the coolness of the liquid before kindly shushed him. He shut his mouth with his lips as he pushed one finger through the tight rim, sensitively settling it into the knuckle.

Seonghwa moaned as the sounds were muffled under the other's mouth, and he pushed himself down into the other's finger, feeling lightheaded and needy. Hongjoong giggled at him, whispered 'cute' under his breath and played on his nipple on the other hand, while inserting a second finger inside Seonghwa's tight hole. He curled his fingers and started scissoring them for the stretch before even deciding to push inside his hole even deeper. Rubbing around the area as he looked up to Seonghwa, lips swollen with worn-out face, he sucked a few hickies on his collarbone before inserting the third finger, pushed all these as deep and stretched as Hongjoong hearing the constant moan from his lover as he pulled and shoved them in and out. He gently rubbed through the inside as he searched for Seonghwa's prostate. 

Hongjoong curled his fingers into a sail nail and pressed in the little bump, and Seonghwa mewled, gasped, and moaned as he continued pushing in his hand, matching with the other's erotic sounds. He licked Seonghwa's mouth while repeating the same process until Seonghwa's eyes rolled back, and his voice broken. Until he shouted and moaning pitifully as he came all over his abdomen. 

Hongjoong let him sit through his oversensitivity before he kissed him one last time, slipped Seonghwa's shaken body until he was on his stomach. As he dipped his head into Seonghwa's shoulder, the body curved up with his whole chest and face rubbed tortuously into the blanket. He was drooling, and his eyes rolled up to the top. Hongjoong fucked into him hard and fast, making Seonghwa babbled on his tongue, tears striking down his face from oversensitivity and the other hardened process building up in his body once again. Hongjoong steadily abused Seonghwa's prostate, and the latter kept moaning as he was, in beat with the gasps and chokes, ruthless and relentlessly. Even when Seonghwa yelped and came out again with a sob, Hongjoong would still be pushed inside him, driving him to the point of oversensitivity.

Seonghwa cried out, saliva and tears streaked on the pillows, but he let Hongjoong break him apart, to damage him, all to his own content. After a moment felt like an eternity, Hongjoong moaned as he pushed his load inside Seonghwa, and exhaustedly laid down, hugging him. Until Seonghwa chuckled and pushing him away, said that he felt nasty that Hongjoong dragged him into the bathroom as they both settled down on the already made hot spring Hongjoong had commanded his servants to make.

Under the lightness of their little exercise, with Hongjoong massaged his back, Seonghwa thought back to himself. _Since when was the last time has he ever received such enjoyment?_

Maybe that Hongjoong was right, his travel to the past must be destiny, or he wouldn't be as free and gratified as he now was. Living his life under pressure and expectations, Seonghwa never really thought to himself despite all of his little complaints. But now, under the buoyancy of time, he got to enjoy more of the missing youth he had a longing for, and Seonghwa was delighted to have them. As long as Hongjoong would forever be part of his journal. In the past or in the future, it doesn't matter, since that would be his everlasting wish.

**Author's Note:**

> congratulations you made it til the end of hell!!
> 
> all comments appreciated! I would love to hear about your thoughts! thank you <3
> 
> and ik the ending was not satisfying, maybe i rushed a lot too but its been a moment suffering and i think that's enough pain for my back hahaha........
> 
> ;-; I'm sorry


End file.
